Manic Mom

Lives Here Now (anonymously, of course!)

Still Looking?

Find The New Blog

Manic Mom's Mental Myriads now resides elsewhere. I'm still out there, but I've joined the Blog Land Witness Protection Program.

Remember, I am a manic mommy and I'm sure you'll be able to find me! And it's okay if my mom finds me too, really. I've got nothing to hide. Or do I?

True / False Answers

This Post Has Joined The Ranks of The Others Previous.

The Best Rejection To Date Is Here:

You know what? I expect rejection letters. I know they are part of the process of getting an agent, of finding the right match for your work. You have to find someone as passionate about your book as you are and that's really, really hard to do. And I'm okay with that. It's like online dating, or regular dating, or making friends, or blog dating, or mating... whatever. You have to find the right match. It's got to be a "Ying and Yang thang." Or something like that.

But this here is the most absurd rejection in the entire world. I think so anyway. And this is my blog so I can think anything I want to.

So, I send Prominent New York Agent a query -- a short, simple one, with not a lot of info, and asked if she would be interested in reading more.

This is the blurb (in case there are any agents out there looking for my book... hee hee):

Ellen McMillan’s plan for the next forty weeks didn’t involve tip-toeing around her infertile sister, getting black-balled from Thursday night happy hour, and spending a week in Jamaica sober. But because of the Two Hearts pregnancy test, she’s becoming a different woman, complete with a new set of boobs and a blooming uterus. Ellen’s got more than her share of pregnancy woes–her OB makes her insides flutter (and it’s not because the baby’s kicking!), her pregnant boss thinks motherhood and career are not synonymous, and her husband is suddenly MIA, both emotionally and physically. She’s in a constant state of panic, thanks to a premonition from a stranger, a medical test gone awry, and the discovery of a family secret kept far too long. How in the world can Ellen make it through the next four days let alone the next forty weeks?

So, this is the response I get from Prominent New York Agent, which was very timely and honest, to give her credit:

I’m sorry; as a woman who plans to never have children, this just doesn’t resonate with me. But thanks very much for giving me a chance.

WTF?

She is a literary agent. Does this mean because she never plans on murdering anyone, she is not interested in representing murder mysteries. Since she is not a man, is she not interested in anything a man would write? Does this mean that since she is heterosexual (I'm assuming), any book with gay characters would be disregarded immediately, and thrown into the Slush Pile? Since she is a literary agent, does this mean any book with a main character with a job unrelated to publishing or writing would not resonate with her?

I so just don't get it. And, if she is choosing not to have children, that's fine, that's her own business, but I have never met a parent who has said, "Oh, I wish I didn't have kids." I have met plenty of people who have said, "Oh, I wish I didn't have this job I have."

Prominent New York Agent seems pretty close-minded to me. But, who am I to say what resonates with her doesn't resonate with someone else. It's just a great, big, grandeous mystery to me. And wouldn't it be HILARIOUS if someday my book would become a BEST-SELLER, and I could do interviews and say, "Oh, Prominent New York Agent didn't even want to read my book because it's about a woman who has a baby." And she would be kicking herself because she would have gotten fifteen percent of a Best-Selling book about a mom, and we all know how boring books like that can be.

That would be soooo cool.

The Joy Of The Sense Of Smell... Or Not.

I smell like how a wet dog smells after chasing a ball into a lagoon, running circles around a skunk and then rolling into a pile of dirt.

I think I should go shower.

Confessional Tuesday

Well, I have spent all day thinking of something really juicy, intriguing, mind-blowing to share on this here, the second-ever Confessional Tuesday ever, and I got nuthin'.

I am a boring person with no secrets.

I'm trying to dig down really deep to come up with some good smut I haven't already shared with you guys. But, I've already told you how my younger brother (then five) caught me and the boyfriend in a compromising situation; I already told you when and where I lost my virginity; I already spill my guts every time I "spill my guts." I share my "fictional" accounted excerpts of stuff; I tell you every time I have a fantastic dream about an ex-boyfriend.

I am an open book who pores her soul out to all who will listen. (Oh, and by the way, that pour / pore thing always gets me in print. I think it should be "pour" as in "spill" but is it really "pore" as in... okay, no, now I am really confused -- I think it's:

She will pour her soul... pore her soul... fuck it... I empty my soul out to all who will listen.

Having said all that, I've decided to host a little True or False on Confessional Tuesday.

Which of the following are TRUE; Which are FALSE?

1. My brother nicknamed me Whale-Bone-Whaler when we were younger, deriving it from the ever-popular fish sandwich at Burger King.

2. I've never had sex in a swimming pool.

3. None of my children weighed over eight pounds.

4. Only three boyfriends ever told me they loved me.

5. Two of them were saying it just to get somewhere.

6. I must use two separate knives for the peanut butter and the jelly.

7. I'll eat any vegetable as long as it has butter or cheese on it.

8. I once suffered from anorexia.

9. I have worn glasses / contacts since I was 13.

10. My teeth are as straight as they were when the permanent ones arrived.

11. I spend way too much money at the cosmetic counter.

12. I have never done chemically-created illegal drugs.

13. The first boy I ever French kissed was named Carter Ganada.

14. I still own the shirt I was wearing the night I met Hubby.

15. I hate cranberry juice.

16. I have thrown up on a plane, ship, car and bus all within a 24-hour period.

17. My first job out of college was as an editor for a small newspaper.

18. I have never been on a blind date.

19. I can count on two hands the number of... well, you know.

20. I used to collect mirrors until I got tired of looking at myself.

21. The first time I got my hair highlighted, I was 30.

22. I have been arrested one time.

23. If given the choice, I would spend the whole day at one of the following places:
Beach
Barnes & Noble
Bed

24. I used to want to be an artist.

25. I used to want to be a dentist.

See, how boring is this? Eleven of them are false.

Confessional Tuesday

Seems like just yesterday I told you about the Woobie, and here it is, another Tuesday and I've got to confess something. Problem is, now that my mom is on to me, I have to confess something probably not worth confessing, something that if Mom reads, she can be like, "Oh, good, she's not talking about the topaz thing anymore."

So, what to confess, what to confess?

Anyone want to know anything specific that is Blog-Mom-Sensitive?

Slowly But Surely...

I am adding LINKS to you Blogger Pals. If you don't see your name to the right, no worries -- this is a work in progress, and I'm trying to get as many of you up as I can. If you hadn't noted that you want to be linked, and want to be linked here, leave me a comment and I'll add you.

On that note, I'm also working on building up my Web site and wonder if you can help out. If you're a regular reader, would you mind leaving a quick, short quote on your thoughts on Manic Mom so I can include on my Web page for the Blog? Send these to the comments section. (You know, something like, "Manic Mom makes me snort coffee out of my nose when I read her." That kind of stuff. None of the usual, "She sucks and she's an alcoholic-pill-popper," although, that might get me more readers!)

Thanks for your help guys! You rock! Also, Dating Dummy tried to help Computer Dummy figure out how to include a link here with my email address but Computer Dummy can't figure out how to do it, so any of you smart-techie-bloggers out there want to give me directions, that would be cool.

WTF?

Okay, can anyone tell me, How The Hell Does This Happen?

Could It Be Any More Depressing?

Gosh, I just went to the grocery store and I'm thinking, "Man, how depressing." The music they were playing over the intercom was just unbearable. If I were a single person, I would be crying in Aisle Five for sure.

First off, they played Open Arms by Journey. There is a particular ex of mine with whom anything by Journey stirs up crazy emotions. And I had had an incredibly 'interesting' dream last night that further added to these strange feelings. Then, Open Arms ended and Annie Lenox's "No More I Love Yous" comes on. Then, Tears for Fears, "Sowing The Seeds of Love" is on. Geeze, I would hate to be a person going through a break-up, being all depressed, not able to eat, and then finally being brave enough to continue on with my life, go to the grocery store to purchase something to eat since I hadn't been able to eat in so long because I was depressed over getting dumped and then going to the store and hearing all this sob-story music. Cripes. Why can't they play fun music, to get you bopping around the aisles, like B-A-N-A-N-A-S, or some Reggae music or the soundtrack of Grease, or some other stuff to make you feel happy about grocery shopping.

But, one thing that did make me happy was that at our grocery store, they have an in-store Starbucks. And after you purchase seven coffees, your next one is free. Guess what? I hit the jackpot this a.m. when it was announced that I would not have to pay for my grandenonfatsugarfreevanilla(NOWHIPBECAUSEIAMNOWCOUNTINGWEIGHTWATCHERPOINTS)latte, and since it was free, "Would I like a venti instead of a grande?"

Uh, duh. Supersize me baby!

So, maybe the venti coffee is what is making me spew out these words like they're the most valuable words I have ever written. On a side-note, my newest vice is to have a tallgrandenonfatsugarfreevanillanowhip, and then to go through the McDonald's drive-through and get a SuperSize Diet Coke with half-ice. I got this combo on Friday, after I had gone to Weight Watchers and discovered that although I hadn't counted points as religiously as I used to, I still lost 2.2 pounds that week. (If you've ever done WW or know of anyone who has lost weight on the program, every single freaking ounce lost counts, hence the point-two previously mentioned.)

But, anyway, the combination of a hot latte and a cold Diet Coke was wowza, and I was pumped!

So, that's my coffee story.

Finally, I was checking out, taking note that Brooke Shields (who I actually got to speak with on the phone once for an article I was writing) is pregnant with baby number two. I say Great for her! And sorry to hear that Brit and Kev are having parental woes. What'd you expect though -- he's like dad to a few other kids -- this baby-making thing is not exciting for him. It's just another notch in his belt, so to speak!

Anyway, I'm checking out and the lady in front of me looks at my stuff, cuz come on, who doesn't check out other peoples' stuff, and she goes, "Looks like somebody runs a daycare?"

I told her that no, I didn't run a daycare but I did have three kids, hence the teddy grahams, juice boxes, fruit snax, cereal, chicken-noodle-o's, raviolis...

I cracked up. Running a day care was the most hilarious thing I'd ever heard, because 1) I would never have the patience to run a daycare, and 2) I would never WANT to run a daycare.

So, there you have it, my grocery store story, no majorly personal info, no embarrassing stories about relatives, no information that might tell you where I live... just some thoughts while shopping. All safe blogging fodder!

Playgroup, Anyone?

I just found this online. It's something I wrote a while ago and just discovered it again via Google:

Everything I Needed To KNow, I Learned At Playgroup.

I kind of miss those days when the most exciting event of the week was Playgroup. Unless, of course, it was my turn to host it that week!

Poi Dog Pondering

Last night we saw my favorite local band, and words can't describe the music, the energy, the atmosphere, the camaraderie of the group there to hear and watch and sing along with Poi Dog Pondering.

I'll try.

They're a local Chicago band who has (or is it have--this is one grammatical rule I just can't ever figure out) been around for probably 15-20 years. We've seen them about 10 times, and each time the show is energetic, uplifting, fascinating. There are about 11 members of the band with loads of instruments -- drums, trombone, cello, violin, guitars, synthesizers. You can't describe the type of music either... it's so ecclectic and different from probably anything you've ever heard, or thought you might like. And some people don't like this music. I do.

When we were in Philly, they came to a small venue, where Abra Moore opened for them. Before the show, Frank Orrall, the lead singer, walked past me and I went up to him, mentioned we used to follow them in Chicago all the time and now we lived out in Philly and were so happy they were in our town. We shook hands, he was very gracious and kind, and of course, I am easily star-struck. Since they are not as well-known on the east as in Chicago, we were front-and-center, Frank's sweat spilling onto me as he sang his songs, which are extemely poetic, thought-provoking, inspirational and even spiritual. The words just get to me.



I ended up front-and-center last night too, and at one point, nearing the end of the show, when Frank stopped to take a swig of his Heineken, I handed him a pen, asking him to sign the playlist taped to the floor. He did, apologizing that it was messy, and gave it to me. During the show he also did that thing where a singer will go into the crowd and be surfed through the hands of the people. How trusting is that -- to allow yourself to swim along a see of strangers, to let them reach for you, to let them move your body through the flow of fans, just so they can grab some energy from you.





And, later, there was a bouquet of flowers on the stage; he took them from the vase and started handing them to people in the audience. I got one, a white lilly not yet open, and later, in the parking garage, I gave my flower to a girl who was at the concert and noted she wished she had one. Heck, I've had a personal conversation with the guy before; I got his signature; I took their bottled water from the stage to drink last night; I also got a guitar pick. She can have the flower. Okay, I'm somewhat of a groupie, I guess you could say.

You have to check them out. Let me know what you think.

Blogger

MMMM might be going under some changes in the future because of some unforeseen circumstances I will definitely explain to you later. You may have noticed my archives are no longer available, and I'm considering moving somewhere else into Blog Land.

There are some things I can no longer post about. Topics no longer approved for discussion may or may not include... well, anything of a personal nature, really.

When I started this blog, I didn't take into consideration a thing called Privacy and I might have put myself out there a little too forcefully, and some think this could be a dangerous thing as there are crazies out there, looking to stalk and kill and murder unsuspecting Bloggers who are only Blogging because they love to write, love to hear the thoughts of others, love to connect with other writers.

Someone asked me why I do this. And if I had any friends, and if I was lonely?
Answers:
Why does anyone do anything they enjoy?
Yes, I have friends.
No, I'm not lonely.

To me, it's a hobby, a form of expressing myself, an artistic outlet, and yeah, maybe I do seek the approval of others; I do want to hear from others that they enjoy my writing style, or that, as a mom, they too can relate to my parenting woes and joys. I do this because I think it's fun and I like to look at life in a humorous way and I like to make people laugh at some of the funny things that go on in my life.

But, when it becomes too much of an exposure, too much information shared, then it might be time to make some changes. And, I guess, in my hastiness to learn to Blog properly, and in my naivety, I might have expressed myself, shared too much, to you.

I might have goofed it all up.

There Mom.

Archive Bye-Bye. Happy? 143

I'm An Aunt!

Hubby's sister and her husband are officially the proud new parents to their son, Ethan Michael, who became theirs today after a long awaited adoption procedure through Russia.


I'm so thrilled and can't wait to meet their baby!

Lyrical Lunacy

You know how when a line in a song just gets you? I've been listening to this particular song when I'm running and it just hits a nerve in me. I think that if the singer was looking into my eyes, singing these words to me, I might just die.

"I walk along these hillsides in the summer 'neath the sunshine, and am feathered by the moonlight, falling down on me."

Anyone want to guess?

More On Tuesday

Well, well, well, I have just been made the recipient of some very juicy Blog-Gossip and feel extremely privvy to be in on the big secret of two Blog-Lovers who have found each other through their Blogs, and will, because I am not a Blog-Ruiner, continue to remain nameless until the two make their own announcement on their own blogs. Why ruin all the fun!?

I knew having a Confessional Tuesday would pay off in a major way! Congrats to the lovebirds. I am sooo psyched for you two and cannot wait for the book to come out! You have to write the book--there is not one out there on finding love Blog-Style. Hell, I'll be your agent!

On another note, I have, once again, stolen something from the very talented, and I'm sure beautiful, (judging from her kindergarten picture) MoDigLi

So, to answer the burning questions on blogging:

1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognizes you from your blog?
No, I just try to remember the damn list, but I do know someone who puts on a ton of lipstick and heels to shop at the grocery store while on vacation, in a town where the odds are completely ZILCH that she'll run into anyone she knows.

2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered?
I don't alter photos. What you see is what you get.

3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you?
Creeps, yes. Dorks, no.

4. Do you lie in your blog?
Depends. What's your definition of a lie?

5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog?
I'm not sure what that means? Anyone care to explain? Does this mean I'm bitter, or I try to get back at someone who has wronged me? Probably.

6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop?
Yeah, I think I did that once, and thanks to all those who told me not to stop!

7. Are you in therapy? If not, should you be? If so, is it helping?
I'm not in therapy. I went to a 'counselor' for two or three visits a few years back. The first appointment, I cried, spilled my guts. The second appointment, I had to make up shit so we could use the whole hour. The third appointment, we stared at each other until the hour was up.

8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones?
I have gotten some mean comments but I didn't delete them. I didn't fake any nice ones.

REMOVED DUE TO UNSUITABLE CONTENT

10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less?
I don't know, can my readers who do know me in person answer this one in the comments?

11. Do you have a job?
Actually, yeah, kind of, and I just got a promotion, kind of. But first off, I am a mom, and that's my number one job. My "sorta-kinda-paying" job is an editor for a parenting website, and I love doing this because I can work any time I want, work as many or as few hours as I want. I also hope to be able to say in the future that yes, I do have a job, and my job title is AUTHOR. (I'm not going to be so off-the-wall and request BEST-SELLING, but if that were to accompany the job title, I'd take it!)

12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it?
Duh.

13. Which blogger do you want to meet in real life?
J Holden, Christa, DD, Joel, Alani, Breakup Babe, Erin, Memphis Steve seems kind of cool, Tulip... Oh gosh, I know there are more... Oh yeah, Agent 007 for sure... sorry if I missed you--not intentional! Oh, and Stephanie Klein so I can kick her in the ass. I no like her.

14. Which bloggers have you made out with?
Breakup Babe, Christa, Tulip--basically all the girls.

15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have?
I think I don't act either way. I gripe a lot about being on credit-card parole, but really don't make judgments on who has money. It's all in the heart, baby, it's what you got right here (thumps chest).

16. Does your family read your blog?
Oh yeah. Hi everyone! Well, I know my mom does, because she thinks I'm going to get murdered because I am too open about things. I wasn't sure about my MIL, but she told me the other day she enjoyed the pics I posted when my girlfriends were in town. I think quite a few friends of mine read this. Hoping someday ex-boyfriends will google me and find Manic Mom and read all about me and think "Wow, and to think I let her get away!" Ha!

17. How old is your blog?
I've been blogging one year in December and it is so addicting.

18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care?
I don't get 1000 page views a day. I think I average 200-400 though, which is pretty cool. I'm at 22,000 hits now, but that's not from when I started cuz I couldn't figure out how to put a tracker on.

19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar?
Yes, it's called: Manicmomisadepressedsluttyliar.blogspot.com.


20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing?
No but I often offer sexual favors. KIDDING.

21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes?
Money, what money?

22. Is blogging narcissistic?
It's therapy. Here's a question for you--"Is reading blogs voyeristic?"

23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time?
No, just the opposite, like right now my poor son is upstairs coughing up a lung and here I am, blogging my heart out.

24. Do you like John Mayer?
Totally, totally, totally. Love the song... shit, what's it called, it's on my itunes... Oh yeah, Body is a Wonderland. I even blogged about that song once. And the highschool song is pretty cool too.

25. Do you have enemies?
Anyone? Anyone? Beuhler?

26. Are you lonely?
Nope.

27. Why bother?
See answer #22.

P.S.--Did I get you on number 19?

Confessional Tuesday

Okay, I'm going to confess something every Tuesday. It might be something really juicy, or really something I just shouldn't share, but I'm going to confess to something every Tuesday, and if you feel like a cleansing is necessary on your part, please, send me a confession in the comments.

Here's my confession:

I sleep with a Woobie.

I haven't always; in fact, I have only had this particular Woobie for a few years, but I love it. It's an off-pink color, not quite pink, not quite purply, almost a dusty mauve, and I think I got it at TJ Maxx a while back. It's got a homemade feel to it, like it's crocheted and sometimes I stick my fingers through the holes of it when I sleep. Or I spoon my Woobie, or wrap it around my body before I snuggle into my bed and get under the real covers. It comforts me. I love my Woobie.

There. My confession. What's yours?

Halloween

Could there by anything worse than being eight-years-old and sick on the couch on Halloween? Poor Ajers is not well, with a cough, fever, all that. And he didn't go to school today, probably the one day all kids WANT to attend for there is a parade, and party, and cupcakes and treats and games. I did promise him in the middle of the night while he was hacking away that no matter how sick he felt, even if I had to pull him in a wagon, I would let him Trick Or Treat at some houses. I've also thought about asking any kid who comes to our door to give one piece of their candy to Ajers and then they could take two of ours. Think they'll go for it? Probably, but they'd most likely give up the crap candy for two of the good things I bought...

Which is all chocolate this year.

I never buy the chocolate stuff. I always buy the Willy Wonka, or Skittles or Sweet Tarts, fruity chewy candies, never the chocolate. Am I torturing myself? Did I do this on purpose?

Here's my oath to you and I'm hoping you all will keep me on track, but I am promising that I will not eat a piece of candy at all today. (Of course, a large cheese pizza might just happen to slide my way, but there will be no candy consumption!)

What are you and/or your kids going as, and how do you celebrate the Ghouliest Day of the Year?

Happy Halloween!

Forget What I Said...

I'm gaining neither perspective or control, so scratch previous post, folks.

Control & Perspective.

I feel like I'm finally gaining some of both.

This week, I went back to Weight Watchers, and I haven't been since July, so it was desperate measures for this desperate bon-bon-eating housewife! I was scared to get on that scale, but I knew if I kept away, the scale would become a dangerous weapon in my home, because the next time I would stand on it, I would become so frustrated and angry I would throw it out the window, possibly maiming an innocent dog-walker or skateboarder on the sidewalk. So, by going to Weight Watchers, I have probably saved a couple lives. I am considered a "Lifetimer" -- sounds much like a prison sentence huh? But this means I have reached my goal weight previously, maintained it for the required six weeks. Even if you reach Lifetime and gain back everything and more, you are still considered a Lifetimer as long as you go each week and pay the dues if you are over the goal weight.

I knew I was over my goal, and I knew it was higher than I wanted it to be, than it should be. So, I went knowing I would be paying the dues. I didn't care, because I need to get myself back into control. I was expecting 'the number' to be about four pounds higher than it actually was, so I was very happy I decided to go back when I did. As it is now, I am 8 - 10 pounds above my goal weight, but I'm getting back on track, so hopefully, I can lose it.

And, I'm still running/walking and it feels really great in this weather, and to have my ipod shuffle blaring stuff like Blue Monday, Dave Matthews, Fix You, Mamma Mia, Everybody Dance Now, Pump Up The Jam, U2 -- you know, stuff to get you really moving.

I've also been in (what Christa and I are calling) a Writing Frenzy, where we are racing against each other, and time, to create words that will turn into a novel. We are going to do the National November Writers' Month aka NaNoWriMo contest, in which the participants have one month to write a 50,000-word novel. (Note to Dating Dummy and ICG--this would be the perfect time to write your best-selling novel about Love Bloggin' Style!)

So far, I've got almost 20,000 words of Undoing It done, but I'm not too sure where it's going. It sure is bringing up a lot of past memories though, as it's a story about the Me who was Then compared to the Me who is Now. Although, it is fiction, kind of. Well, you read the Lemon thing right? That was fiction, but hey, it woud have been fun to be real! I seriously cannot think of a lemon in the usual -ade or garnish-on-a-cocktail sense ever again in my life after what I have written about that glorious fruit!

Hubby and I are going out tonight, but I promise there will be nothing crazy I will have to blog about later on. Tame, nice dinner out, with neighbors. Right? Right. With my new "control and perspective" motto, I've got to be good. At least until it goes right out the window next week when we go see our most favorite local band in the entire world! Anyone wanna take a guess?

Copy Cat

Because MoDigLi did some cool digital-photography of old photos on her Blog, I thought that would be a fun way to spend the afternoon. So, without further adieu, some things around here that I felt like photographing:

Have At It, Critics!

This post temporarily removed by blog-owner.

Hate Or Love

I'll either hate or love Christa as she's becoming my Satan-Writing-Mentor, where I am selling my soul to her in order to write this next novel. I told her today I would write 3,000 words. I only made it to 2,088... But I did sneak in an In Her Shoes viewing, which was incredible, wonderful, emotional, sad, funny, uplifting! And even though I probably wouldn't pick Cameron Diaz for a BF, I do think she is an amazing actress, and any guy would love this movie, if only for the shots of her incredible bod.

So, Christa--how many did you write?

Saw my idol Jennifer Weiner Sunday, and while this was my third time meeting her at book signings, I was admittedly a little bummed she didn't jump out of her seat like she did last time, and hug me, telling the whole audience I was the girl who had been stalking her since day one. Nope, none of that recognition initially. However, her memory was refreshed when I showed her the pic of the two of us in Philly last year, and she remembered my obnoxious email address from all the fan letters I had written her. She asked how my writing was going, and signed my book To My Former Philly Girl, so I guess that's good.



And then I had a Yahoo Chick Lit writer blind date. I'm on this Yahoo Writer's Group whose focus is on writing the Chick Lit humor genre. I met up with the fabulous and beautiful Tricia Garner, editor and writer for Sporting News.We had a great time expressing our infatuation with Jennifer Weiner to anyone who would look our way. And then we met up with Francesca and Gretchen, two great girls, who just happen to be best friends and JW fans as well. We four were front-row center in the packed book store, grinning and nudging each other, and laughing at the funny things JW said. And rolling our eyes when someone would ask a stupid question or a question that if they were a true JW fan, they would have certainly already known by reading her blog, Snarkspot. Duh. If you're not a fan, don't come pretend to be one.

Afterward, the four of us went to Hugo's Frog Bar where we snacked on mini-filet mignon sandwiches with bernaise, bruschetta, and wine, reminiscing about the book signing event. And really, only a true fan would appreciate the experience we had with JW, and I'm glad I got to spend the day with these fun new girls, and share some wine and laughs with them! Shout out to you all! And Gretchen--get writing!

Ajers

My first-born is going to be eight-freaking-years old this week. Cannot believe it.

So this a.m. I actually wake up before Ajers, do the treadmill, take a shower. Then Ajers comes into my room and I say, "Let me look at you."

"What?" he says.

"I just want to look at you so I remember what you looked like when you were seven."

"Mom, I'm still going to look the same, I'll just be a different age."

"You sure?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's not like when you turn 13 and you get all those little red things all over your face."

Cuisine, Vino, Music, Friends, Books

These are some of the things I love, and to be able to enjoy all of them in one setting is a great experience. We got to do this over the weekend.

I became close friends with a girl in college I met senior year, second semester. We got along so great that one night, after an evening of many beers at Molly's, which just so happens to be the place Hubby and I met, Close Friend and I decided since we had become so close in such a short amount of time, we should cement our friendship with a prick of a needle and the co-mingling of blood from our fingertips.

A couple years later, we both admitted to each other that it was a stupid thing to do--I didn't know Close Friend for very long; she hadn't known me very long--what if either of us had shared the AIDS virus! (This is waaaaay back in '91, when AIDS was a headliner in many newscasts, magazines and papers; where we donated blood not in the hopes of saving lives, but in the hopes we wouldn't receive a phone call from the Red Cross telling us our blood was tainted with the AIDS virus.)

Anyhow, friendship was further cemented when CF met Boyfriend-Turned-Husband and My Hubby, CF, Boyfriend-Turned-Husband found out the four of us really enjoyed one another, intellectually and socially. It has been a funny experience being great friends with CF and BTH of CF because more often than not, BTH and I bond over many of life's similarities, while Hubby and CF have fantastic debates on politics, marriage, child-rearing, jobs. See, CF is a very successful career woman, and BTH is an admirable, awesome SAHD. (For those of you not familiar with the abbreviation, it is Stay-At-Home-Dad.)

But, BTH is not just defined as a SAHD, just as I am not just a SAHM. Hubby is not just the family breadwinner, and CF is certainly not just their family's breadwinner. Everyone in every avenue of life is so much more than the one thing that defines us, don't you think? I mean, if you took a look at your life, your personality, who you are and what you do, couldn't you come up with a list of 50+ words to describe the You that you are?

My point of this whole post, aside from sharing the evening of enjoying friends, wine, food, music, etc. is that SAHD is also an incredible chef. Incredible.

So, it's always a treat to be invited into their home because we know we will not only get to spend some time with great friends whom we have a terrific past with, but we will also be very well-fed.

I took pictures. They do not do the food we devoured justice.

Since Close Friend's family lives over an hour away, the kids and I drove to their house as soon as school was out. Since Hubby and CF both work in the city, they grabbed a six-pack at the station, got onto the train together, drank, talked, and crack-berried out during the hour-twenty commute to Close Friend's family home.

SAHD and I walked to the train with the five kids, he and I holding hands, pretending to be the parents of all five kids, laughing as their neighbors looked on confused.

The kids got along great, Hubby was already sporting a buzz when he and CF got off the train, and we all hugged one another, the kids jumping up and down, excited to see their working parents. The air was crisp and windy, the kids' cheeks flushed from running and the chill, but then again, so were Hubby's cheeks, due to the Miller Lites.

Chef Ron, as I will now refer to him throughout the post, went all out. He makes these heavenly rolls that I cannot even properly describe. They are golden and perfectly round, with a butter and salted gloss on top. Diva the Non-Carnivore ate eight of these rolls. No lie. This is when CF suggested that maybe a woman's desire for carbohydrates is something just in our genetic make-up, and emerges at a stunningly young age. I have to agree.

CR made homemade guacamole, oven-roasted turkey mini sandwiches with quince paste, onion, cheese and some amazing sauce, then he grilled them with real butter until they were golden brown and all melty. (My mouth continues to water as I type this!)

We had pork marinated in a chipotle BBQ sauce (I think it was?) with poblano peppers, roasted garlic rice, homemade chocolate chip cookies...



And I found a new wine. I've always been a Pinot Grigio drinker, and am usually not fond of the oaky flavor of Chardonnay. But we've discovered some wines that are "unoaked", meaning they are not fermented in the oak barrel, but in a process where a stainless steel bin is used in the wine-making. Then, the wines are not corked, but a screw-cap is applied. Really. And this is not your Riunite on Ice So Nice Peach and Raspberry flavored we got drunk on in high school. No, this is real good wine. If you're looking for a new one, try Tin Roof Chardonnay. It's light, clean and about eight bucks a bottle. There's also a stainless steel wine called Jale I've had but have not seen it in stores. Has anyone tried?

So, along with the excellent company, obedient children, laughter, food, and wine, we also listened to some fun music including that poppy song about the Doorbell Ringing, Can Ya Hear It by White Stripes, but after a few glasses of wine, I decided to refer to them as White Snake. Also listened to the Garden State CD, some Moby, Peter Gabriel, Lucinda, Coldplay, PJ Harvey... Just fun and good, and most of all, we had such a relaxing night, just sitting, talking, laughing... and I love listening to Hubby and CF debate things such as if downtown Naperville is really a 'city' versus downtown Chicago, and we talked about our beliefs in God, how we are raising our children and exposing them to our culture... yada yada yada, pour me some more wine.

Early bedtime for us ladies, but CR and Hubby stayed up later and practically-almost-but-not-quite finished off a bottle of Jim Beam. In the a.m., CR was at it again, and he made all of this for breakfast! Like I said, the pictures show no justice, but my gut certainly appreciated the six or seven 12 ounces each almost cinnamon rolls I ate,

along with the frittata,


and scrumptious bites of homemade waffles and bacon. Uh, and yes, I am now wearing jammy pants with elastic!

For the book reference to the title of this post, CF lent me a book,
The End of Alice. I am only on page 49, and the best way to describe this book is to say it has beautifully-written words about a very taboo kind of life, a sickening plot, but I am mesmerized as I read the phrases dotting this horror, love, suspense, in-the-mind-of-a-psychotic-person novel. Gee, does that make you want to rush right out and read it? You will be repulsively engrossed in the words and the plot of this story. That I promise you. You may not like it, but it will engross you. All this from pages 1 -49.

As for my agent search--more rejections; there are still some agents out there, either making decisions or trying to decide the nice way to let me down, or maybe my partial has been designated to the bottom of the bottomless pit that is the Agent Slush Pile. I don't know, but right now it's not bothering me, and I will focus on the next novel, tentatively titled Undoing It.
Up for tomorrow--Jennifer Weiner will enthrall me for the third time of me meeting her, where I will listen to her talk of her books, her success, her daughter, and the life of a famous best-selling author. And where I will probably get very nervous and sweaty, and say something really stupid like reminding her that I'm like that chick in Misery, but I'm not planning on kidnapping her and hobbling her, I just want her to be my best friend and have her agent represent me. Is that too much to request?

And on Monday, I am venturing into the city to go to a fiction event where four chick-lit authors will be reading from their latest novels, and we will be drinking wine together. Could it get any better? I guess it could--I could be one of the authors in the spotlight reading from a book I have written. Yes, that would definitely be better! But for now, I'll take what I can get, and learn from these women I so long to be like!

Big News!

I have been talking with my friend, who I will call High School Prom Queen, and she has been giving me cooking tips. She manages a family with three kids as well, volunteers, updates her household, exercises with me, teaches Religious Ed... all these things and she can still manage to create enticing, enjoyable, scrumptious meals for her family of five like pratically EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!

Sooo, in taking her culinary advice, I am going to attempt to pick out, and purchase, and take home, and de-gut, and wipe off, and pat dry, and lubricate and salt and pepper, and cook in a roasting pan (which I need to buy one of those too) a...

CHICKEN!

She says it's really easy.

PS... although I can't attempt this tonight because I've organized a neighborhood ladies' night out so while, I won't be in the kitchen whipping up a roasted chicken, I may have some funny stuff to post about all the Desperate Housewives and what happens when you get twenty of us together in a room at a restaurant with a two-hour open bar.

A Hiatus

I'm thinking about taking one. I love this Blog, I think it's therapeutic for me, but it also takes up a ton of my time; time I could be thinking about learning to cook, time I could be sorting the damned socks on the living room couch; time I could be focusing more on the kids.

But, I don't want to stop. Like most of you, writing is in your blood, but right now, I don't even feel like working on the real writing, not that this isn't real writing, but I just don't know. I have to admit, it was a nice break not being a slave to the computer all weekend and all of today, and most of yesterday. I need to stop the surfing because, while entertaining, there are more important things in my life. I wish there was a way to balance it all, and how selfish of me to even be thinking this way, when there are people out there so totally dedicated they manage to work full-time jobs, raise a family, cook freaking dinners every night, have the laundry done, make love with their husbands, entertain their kids, volunteer at school, be a soccer mom... why can't I do it all?

So, this is just sort of a free-form post tonight, and already I feel much better tapping away at the keys, seeing the words come to life, thinking about what I want to write. Already I feel happier. So, why then is it that I want to quit? To focus on other things, or to just figure out a way to balance it all? Why, why, why? Marsha, Marsha, Marsha! Don't know why I just wrote that--must be a Brady thing.

My mind just completely went blank. I don't know what else to write.

Deep, thoughtful pause, where I sit here trying to think of something euphoric to write...

Damn. Still considering. Watching the curser taunt me. I promised
Christa, Writer Extraordinaire I would come up with ten pages of the new WIP by Friday. I'm not sure I can do it. I don't know where to start. But I guess, like this post, I didn't know where to start either, and here I keep going. That's what it's all about I guess, having the urge to want to do something so badly, that nothing, not even sleep, or family responsibilities, or laundry, or school volunteering, or sex, can come in the way. Is this a bad thing? I'm not sure. I think it may be. But, to be able to sit here and just do what I want to do most in the world, when nothing comes out, it just feels like wasted time, failing.

OK, done with that rant. Quick notes from my Girl's Weekend. It ROCKED! We went to a million and twelve places in the city, drank a million and twelve cocktails, ate a million and twelve things, and here's the long and short of it:

Where we slept

Where we drank

Where we drank some more and almost, thisclose, had a John Cusack run-in!



Where we ate and had some really good margaritas



Where we avoided the $10 cover charge and listened to pianos rival one another with White Snake and Bon Jovi songs--really, it was fun!

Where we made the mistake of going to the 12:30 a.m. show where really only freaks and really, really drunk people would attend

Souvenirs and photo opps.



Rockin' Popcorn!

Where we shopped; I could have cared less

Breakfast Salad

Suburban dining at its best!

Suburban cocktails at its best!



Cute waiter who also is lead singer and guitarist for this band!

Post weekend hangover food I thought I'd be able to keep down

What I finally ate on Monday morning

We didn't get to see the bean.

It was awesome, and it could have turned out disastrous, as my gal pals' plane was two hours delayed, we didn't get back to my house until 2 a.m. where I was then up until 4:30 a.m. because, OF COURSE, Tukey was sick in the middle of the night, and OF COURSE, wouldn't you know it--DOUBLE FREAKING EAR INFECTION! Thankfully, wonderful, supportive awesome husband took him to the doctor, got a mega antibiotic prescription for Tukey and took great care of the kids all weekend long. He even ventured to his parents overnight Saturday so we girls could have the house to ourselves--I swear, it was a sorority house here, not that I was ever a sorority girl, but, you get the picture. Speaking of pictures, I'll post a few here.

Okay, guess I don't want to quit this. It's just too much fun, and a whole helluva lot cheaper than therapy! Hope you all had a great weekend and that the weather by you is like it is here--Indian Summer in the '70s!

(And of course, as with any Girls' Weekend and photo shoot, there are the requisite cleavage shots but I can't post 'em.)

I'm Back

Here's a brief detail about our weekend: Today, Monday, I rose from the dead, ate Kentucky Fried Chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy for breakfast at 8:30 a.m. I've also inhaled a Little Debbie's brownie and four homemade (of course, not by me) chocolate chip cookies, and to rehydrate, I've had five diet 7-ups. I don't see a grandenonfatsugarfreevanillalatteezwhip in my future for a long, long while. That may just shred my stomach...

Pictures and a complete play-by-play of the weekend with my mom friends from Philly to come.

And, good news, I didn't hit any walls...

Too Freaking Cool!

I'm working my way through a migraine, probably because I am scrubbing this house into a frenzy and am delirious with the fumes from the Carpet Fresh, Pledge Wipes, Clorox Wipes, Lysol Toilet Bowl Cleaner... but, alas, my close gal pals from Philly are arriving TONIGHT: Stacy, Julie, Kelly, Erica and Di, and we are going to tear it up Ferris Beuhler style in the city! So, I just had to clean the house, right?

Anyway, NOT MY ORIGINAL POINT. This is:

Go to Ex-Girlfriends Revenge and laugh your ass off. She has posted an Ex of mine, and some of you readers know him as "Chams The Man" from Freshman year in college. Ex-Girlfriend took some of the privvy info I willingly gave her and came up with a dossier (sp?) that suits him PERFECTLY!

If you're a woman (OR HEY, EVEN A MAN!) and you've been jilted (and who hasn't?), send your info to Ex-Girlfriends Revenge and she can put together a nice little post about your Ex. She's very accurate, by the way, especially about how Daytona Boy was less than ... well, you'll just have to go read about it at Ex-Girlfriends Revenge!

Oh, and I'm still working on the list of sites that I'll be posting from the recent post... but that'll have to wait until my crazy all-girls-all-food-all-drinks-all-fun weekend in Chicago, where Stacy has already promised me she will let me get Fun-Stephie-Drunk but not Puke-Stephie-Drunk. I hope she can handle the job!

A Game For Fun

If you're a regular reader, or even if you're not, if you like this Blog, or hate it with a vengence, you're invited to play this game:

Send me a comment with your age and your sex. Then when you get your Word Verification, make up a sentence using each one of those words as the first word. If you go to the comments right now, I'll start. Hope I get a good one!

The more creative, the better, obviously! Limited profanities, please!

OMG...

I think I just got turned on by something I wrote. Wow. That was cool. I might have to read it again!

And since I like what Anna does, I'll start keeping track of the words, pages I am writing, maybe as a visual incentive to keep going.

Words written today: 912
Total words: 6,670
Total pages: 27

Currently Reading: Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner,
(WARNING: STOP READING THIS POST NOW IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THIS BOOK!)...

(Okay, continue)...and while she is my all-time author-extraordinaire idol, I'm not quite sure how I'm feeling about this book. I do jump into bed, excited to read it, but then later the next day, I'm not too sure what I feel... maybe the mystery thing has got me all confused, finding a dead Desperatey-Housewifey chick in her kitchen with a knife in her back... Just not too sure. And maybe that's good, because I have no idea who did it, although I'm starting to think EM, for those of you who are reading it, but then again, maybe, that's what Jen Weiner would want us to think. No wait! I bet it was Kate's husband! That would give Kate an excuse to divorce him and be with the one she really loves! Hmmm... maybe I am into this book!

Currently Listening To: Krafty By New Order; Fix You By Coldplay. Not at the same time.

The Changing Of The Guards

You've heard of that right? At Buckingham Palace, I think.

Well, today I had The Changing Of The Jeans.

Not fun. I hate this time of year; I love this time of year; I loathe this time of year; I welcome this time of year; I dread this time of year; It is here.

Put the t-shirts away, and the shorts and capris.
Sadness arrives like a denim pair
that no longer fits
even tho it has stretch fabric and
should give way
to the spreading thighs
of summer cookouts,
one-too-many margaritas
and the never-ending quest
for chocolate
during that time.

The jeans are here.

Tukey Talk

So, we're in the minivan, headed to the country to visit Hubb's parents. Diva and Ajers are in the middle seats and Tukey's in the way, way back being pretty quiet. He's never in the back by himself, and he's never very quiet. It's kind of a long drive, for a kid anyway. He must have been bored because all of a sudden, he has something very interesting to say.

Tuke: "Hey guys!" We all turn our heads (except for Hubby who was driving) because the way he said, "Hey guys", it sounded like it was something very important.

"I just dared myself to eat a booger!"

Me: "Did you do it?"

Tuke (waaaay too proudly): "YEP!"

Let's Get It Started!

I'm listening to this song from Black-Eyed Peas. So, let's get it started!

I would like to share some of your blogs with some other blog surfers and readers. There are so many of you out there with great blogs, and I think one of the goals of a blogger is to capture an audience, an audience who offers words of wisdom, pearls of perception, kernels of ... (can't come up with a K or a C word, but kernels sounds good...) anyway, I feel readers and what they have to say help writers find out more about themselves, who they are, who they want to become. That's my opinion anyway. And as a writer, I would think you are writing in order to touch other peoples' lives, so maybe this will help you find the audience who is most certainly looking for you.

So, and maybe this is out of line, but I want to create a National-Share-Your-Blog Week, starting NOW. If you would like to have others find you on the internet, just leave me a comment and include your URL to the site, and then next week, I will compile a list of them (no offensive blogs/posters please!), create a specific post entry for these unique blogs, and this way, readers will be able to find each other. I will plan on re-posting these blogs each month.

I know there are sidebars you can link other bloggers to, but those tend to get lost in the blog, so this way, it'll give your blog some added exposure, and hopefully get the word out about the great things you have to say!

Additionally, if you want, I would also complile the list and send it to my email addresses to those I think would like your site.

Other interested bloggers, it would be cool for you to post something like this on your site to spread the word...

I'm all about the PR, and if you're a serious blogger, this is one way to get the word out. To let others know you are out there. It's kind of like a door-to-door salesman, but without the vacuums or Bibles, or encyclopedias!

So, Let's Get It Started! Drop me a comment with your URL if you're game!

Tagged; I'm It!

Wonderful, fun, hip, and cool Erin tagged me, so here goes:

1) Shampoo and Conditioner - Infusium 23

2) Soap - Dove with those little exfoliants in 'em.

3) Colors - Hot pink, maroon, yellow, green

4) Soda - Diet Coke/Pepsi with Lemon. But Vernon's Ginger Ale is really good too, but not the diet kind.

5) Foods - Pizza, pasta, french fries (wonder where Diva gets her shitty eating habits?)

6) Movie - Sixteen Candles and In Her Shoes, (even though I didn't go see it when it opened last night, have yet to see it, but am sure I will love it!) Oh, and Say Anything with Lloyd Dobbler (John Cusack) mostly because of the scene where he is blaring In Your Eyes, which is my favorite song, which will probably be the next question, right?

7) Band - Poi Dog Pondering. Great Live. Dave Matthews Band. Great Live. Peter Gabriel. Great Live.

8) Disney Character - Pluto does not get enough attention. He's not my favorite though.

9) Actor - Aidan Quinn, John Travolta, Charlie Sheen (but like when he was in Lucas), Nicolas Cage, Will Ferrel is pretty funny--taco, burrito, what's that in your speedo?

10) Actress - I am not sure.

11) Video Games - When I was little, when they had arcades, I rocked, rocked, rocked on CENTIPEDE, Q-BERT, and of course, the beloved Ms. Pac-Man.

12) Computer Games - Does Blogging count as one?

13) Store - Barnes & Noble.

14) Alcohol - None since The Green Tie Ball. Next weekend though, when my Philly Gal-Pals arrive, it's all about the 'Tinis! And I've been promised that they will not let me get Puke-Stephie-Drunk, just Happy-Stephie-Drunk.

15) Number - 14

16) Car - I don't know but we've already told Ajers that when he turns 16 he gets the Minivan, and I'll get whatever I freaking want!

17) Book - Jen Weiner, Alice Sebold, Wally Lamb, Emily Giffin, Judy Blume.

18) T.V. Show - None.

19) Website - Snarkspot, Jennifer Weiners. Oh, and http://www.stephanielliot.com.

20) Condiment - Mayo.

21) Fruit - Pineapple.

22) Vegetable - Does Corn Count.

23) Restaurant - Any place that has no children. Any place that I'm there with friends and hubby. Any place I have a gift certificate to. Any place anyone else is treating. Any place with great wine service. Any place with... God, I want to go out to dinner now!!!

24) Blogger - See above post.

25) Place - Grand Cayman, specifically Rum Point. Barnes & Noble.

Who to tag, who to tag--I'm going to get some new blood in here now, so share the love folks!

Indy Boy
Tobias
Heather
Exgirlfriend
Kelly
Cute Unknown Man With Flower

Word Verification

Every time I get a Word for word verification and I see a Q on it, I cringe, because I know I'm going to automatically type a U right after it and screw up my word.

MUCH BETTER!

Okay, I'm going to just write.

I feel much, much better because I was in a terrible funk, and not sure if it was period-driven, agent-driven, not-seeing-my-husband-since-Tuesday driven, writing-driven, children-driven, depression-medicine-driven, weight-gain-driven, lack of my grandenonfatsugarfreevanillalattewithezwhip-driven but I am better.

Whew.

I just said screw it, get out of this mood, and what way would make me immediately feel better about myself? By doing something good for myself, not in the ways of a Starbucks fix, but in a healthy matter.

I put on those $90 shoes and just ran. The most I have in ten years. I had my ipod with music chosen specifically for running, and it was a great feeling. I feel better.

Reasons I wasn't feeling too happy. And they are completely not legitimate reasons if I look all around me and see what other people don't have, have lost, want, need, etc.

And, "dear readers" (and that's in quotes because I hate when Bloggers refer to the people who read their blogs as dear readers), I'm going to be completely, completely honest here, and I know this is what some of you want to know.

I didn't like that an anonymous poster wrote something unkind.

There, you happy? This is the result you wanted. You made me feel badly. You won. But not for long, because I don't feel that way anymore. And I wasn't feeling bad because you said I posted "crap" and "trash." I posted something I felt like sharing, and if you've ever been in a writer's group or a writing class, it's scary to share your work, to read it in front of everyone, and even scarier to read something you have written that could have been of a personal nature. You bare your soul when you let someone read the words that come from within.

I don't care that you didn't like it. Hell, I hate The Catcher in the Rye. I hate Hemingway. I could care less about A Tale of Two Cities, Jane Eyre, Whoever...I don't even read the classics, or even know who some of the classic authors are. It's my choice. I have an opinion and if I don't want to read something, I don't.

What I posted is definitely not my best written piece, it's not my worst. It's not even something from the novel I wrote, and it might not even be something from the novel I am trying to write now. It was, as I titled it, "JUST SOMETHING."

The thing that gets me is that someone would deliberately set out to do something mean, to try to hurt someone, whether or not you know me, I don't know -- but I think you do, or else you're a very lonely person who gets kicks going onto random blogs and posting mean things.

If you wanted to critique what I had written, you should have done what Tobias did, and offered something constructive, something I could have taken from you in order to make my writing better. You're just mean and that makes me think you've got nothing better to do and you've got a lonely life, and for that, I feel sorry for you.

You might want to take a look inside and see what's missing from your life and how to make it better. Like I have done.

Mixed-Up Funk

About a lot of things. I'm going for a run; maybe that'll clear my head and I'll blog about this mixed-up funk later.

Just Something.

She got up to take a shower, kissing him before she left the bed. Hell, she would play the same game. Let’s see if he can hold out, she thought. She kissed him deeply, their morning breath mingling, and then she got out of bed, but he reached for her as she got up, touched the smooth skin of her back, tried to pull her back to him. This was what she wanted. But instead, she got up and left for the shower. She knew he was hard with wanting, but more than her wanting him, she was mad at being rejected, and now she wanted him to feel what she had felt. Rejection. This was a game she could try to play.

But what was the point? If they desired one another, why couldn’t they just say so, to say, I want you, I want to be with you. I’m ready for you again. Why couldn’t he just open up to her, as she had to him.

She kissed him lightly one last time, and he rested his chin on her shoulder, and she felt him inhale her deeply, so much so, that it gave her goosebumps. A chill of want.

Purposefully, she kept the door open to the bathroom, made the water extra hot, as steamy as she could stand it. She had hoped he would join her. She soaped her skin slowly, deliberately, taking her time so he would know that she was waiting for him. She took her hair into her hands and lathered until her hands were filled with suds. She felt happy, and giggled.

The shower curtain withdrew a bit.

“What’s so funny?” He asked, searching her face.

She didn’t feel shy to have him look at her body as she bathed. You would think a private person would shy away from having someone stare so intently at her nakedness, but she stood there, waiting. To see if he would come to her. She purposefully stood up straighter, showing off her breast, her hips, her tummy, and she took the soap and began washing again. He just grinned at her, and just when she thought he would join her, instead, he brought his hand up and wiped just above her eyebrow.

“Soap almost in your eye,” he said. “Hurry up, okay?”

She took her fingers and made a splash gesture at him, sprinkling him with water.

“Fucker,” she said and grinned.

He laughed at her. This would have been the perfect moment for him to say it, to say that he was crazy in love with her, to tell her how much he meant to her, to finally be honest.

He let go of the shower curtain, and then she heard the bathroom door close shut.

Quick Manic Mom Poll

Does the whole world's female population have their periods this week?

And completely related, has anyone ever been to an Ethel's Chocolate Lounge? I'm headed there now! Ha, ha, PMS joke, but there really is a place called Ethel's Chocolate Lounge where their slogan is Come To Chocolate And Chit-Chat, or something like that.

(I bet Joel and Alani stopped there this weekend?)

Shhh....My New Purchase

How can I hide the 40-inch diameter mirror I bought at the flea market yesterday from My Hubby, aka Sleeping-With-The-Enemy guy, but not how he beats Julia Roberts, and not how he expects the Campbell soup cans to be lined up, but how he is now obsessing over the credit card...

(Sidenote--I know, I know, I don't pay the bills, I don't know how much money is spent each month--actually, I do because he printed out the itemized list this month, and I have to agree, shhh... it is a little bit excessive, but it's not MY fault we had a wedding to go to in Buffalo; it's not MY fault it was Tukey's birthday and I bought him a Cold Stone Creamery birthday cake for $30; it's not MY fault that it's Fall and the kids are growing taller and they needed some new clothes from TARGET for crying-out-loud; it's not MY fault that I felt it would be more economical to purchase the Zoo membership rather than pay $40 for this visit and $40 for the next visit and so on when I could get a much better deal with the membership; it's not MY fault that we had to go to the stupid Green Tie event for his work-which, by the way, the $250 tickets EACH were FREE, and it's not MY fault that I needed to look presentable and had to buy an outfit with matching necklace--that I'm still glad I bought because I love the necklace; it's not MY fault people in this house want to eat food. Is it?)

I'm on lockdown though. Jailed. No time off for good behavior.

But, if I had balls, I would have sweated them off this a.m. trying to hoist this huge mirror I bought (WITH MY OWN, VERY OWN CASH I MADE ON MY OWN FOR WORKING FOR BABYZONE.COM THANK YOU VERY MUCH!). So, said mirror is on the wall, and let me tell you, it was not fun getting it up there. L has bet me a Starbucks he won't even notice it. HOW CAN YOU NOT NOTICE A 40-INCH DIAMETER MIRROR?!!?

I kept the mirror at L's house last night, called her this morning and asked, "Do you still have the contraband? Can you bring it over?"

So, L drives it over, and like Lucy and Ethel, we try to figure out how to get it up onto the wall, and Thank God there was already hooks in the studs from the previous owners, who we still had the previous owner's custom artwork up there until we could find a replacement so I had to get the ladder from the garage, one of those big ones that expand really, really tall. Then I had to climb up there and believe me, I started getting afraid of heights it's so high up (we have cathedral ceilings). Then L and my other friend J hoist the mirror up and I'm sweating to death, imagining my demise over a mirror and a ladder, and then we get it up there, and L says, "The wire in the back is not long enough to hook on both hooks?"

WTF?

I said there's no way I'm coming back down to fix the wire because it took about an hour just to do that part and then we reinforced it with black electrical tape, so dammit all, that mirror is going on this wall somehow right now or I just might have to kill someone!

YAY! I persevered and got the mirror up onto the hooks.

Fortunately, I like it there because even if I hated it, I was not taking it down. I can see it right now in fact, and I smile every time I see it because it makes me happy. See, I'm smiling right now.

And I'll keep on smiling until Sleeping With The Enemy (kidding, hon! Just kidding--like he even knows how to find my blog anyway!) comes home, makes a little after-dinner drink and heads upstairs to change out of his suit and he sees the mirror and then we won't talk the rest of the night, unless he makes some comment like, "Where'd that come from?"

If he says that, I'm going to say, "Well, didn't you know, the mirror fairy came last night!"

Oopsy

I'm grounded. On credit-card suspension with no parole in sight.

And it's not like I use it frivously for Prada, Anne Taylor, Gucci, etc. Hell, I buy my shoes at Payless and Target! (I think I'm grounded because I spent $90 on a pair of good quality running shoes so I can get in shape and lose some weight and find me a rich, new man! hee, hee, just kidding, honey, we all know it's "Cheaper-to-keep-her!.)

In other Manic Mom news, I have the first sentence of my second novel figured out, as well as the final three sentences. I can tell you the jist of the first part:

She didn't remember if she chose special underwear to wear that night. She didn't think anyone else would be seeing them.

Can't tell you the last line. Tomorrow, I may work on the 380 pages I'll need in between the bread of those two lines to make me a novel sandwich!

One good thing about credit-card suspension is I'll have no reason not to sit here in front of an empty page and try to think of something clever to write.