Chocolate.

I am not a sweets person. Give me salty chips and spicy salsa and I'm good all day long, but given the choice, I would definitely not eat a candy bar over a bag of chips.

Then, why in the hell did I scarf down a minimum of 200 M&Ms today, AND... hold on to your hats... seriously, at least 14 double-stuffed Oreos, some cool mint, some just plain old cream. Period, where hath are thou? The tides, they are a coming. When someone suggested that maybe I was suffering from PMS, I thought, Who Me? I never get symptoms. And now, this month, they are exploding in all sorts of directions, leading me dangerously to anything chocolate within a 5 mile radius. I'm scared.

One thing I did today was put like 10 M&Ms into my mouth and sucked on them until they all kind of melded together, then stuck out my tongue, checked out the blackness of my teeth, and then chomped down on the delicious glob of candy. I have never eaten M&Ms this way. In the rare event that I even do eat M&Ms, I (used to be able to, anyway) would seriously take FIVE or SIX, and make them last ten minutes, enjoying one teeny-tiny one at a time. But no, Something bad happened today.

And the Oreos. Damn this snow and damn the kids for making their very first cute mini-snowperson outside. Diva comes in from outside and says she needed a carrot and some black buttons. I had the carrot, but aside from cutting the buttons from one of my twelve black coats to use for eyes, I had nothing... but Oreos. Double stuffed Oreos in mint and plain cream.

So, I take the cookies outside, peel one open, suck out the white cream, and plop the lid onto the snowperson's face for an eye. It crunched and fell apart. So, I took another Oreo and repeated. After about six attempts at getting them to stick, I said, I've already screwed everything up and I went inside to see how many more Oreos we had left. And, just as I did last night, I figured it would be better to be rid of them, than to have them tempt me on the shelf. So, I made sure the kids were content in the front yard next to Snowy, and I demolished the rest of the Oreos. I almost wanted to throw them up afterward, because, have you ever thrown up Oreos? As sick as it may sound, I bet it tastes pretty good.

Hopefully, the chocolate disaster is no longer and I will cleanse the body of the damning stuff tomorrow.

Next subject: Diva had a BIG, BIG week! It's a shame because she accomplished so many things in like five days that no five year old should be allowed to do in such a short time span because it leaves no room for parental enjoyment.

First up: She's now riding a two-wheeler, as I mentioned. She has also just discovered her very first loose tooth, which I now realize I have also mentioned. In addition, she tried a hot dog this week, took her amoxicillon without blowing a gasket (that's why we have the fifty-pound bag --well, 42-pound bag now--of M&Ms -- I told her I would give her some if she took her medicine without throwing a fit), and for the grand finale, she learned to tie a shoelace in the middle of the floor at Payless today. Ta-Dum! Too many accomplishments for such a short time.

Ajer--he's fine. Just driving me loco with his insatiable need to be entertained, or have an activity planned for him. Can't the kid ever just SIT for five minutes? He begged and begged and begged and begged and pleaded and then begged some more for Santa to bring Game Cube, and I was so worried it would preoccupy an immense amount of time in his life. No such luck. He's even too bored to play video games, and isn't that ALL seven year old kids want??

And lastly, my little Tookie comes into Diva's room tonight as I'm reading her "Chocolate - A Sweet History" and he is distraught and crying uncontrollably. I thought he had a bad dream. I thought he fell out of the bed. I thought, I didn't know what to think other than here is my little Tookie crying about something that has obviously disturbed him. Know what was wrong? He was afraid the scarf on Snowy would fly off during the night and we would lose it. I *promised* him I would go out and get it so it couldn't fly away and tucked him back in and cuddled until his breathing was steady and he was twitching in his sleep, signifying REM was apon him.

I am just going to be in so much trouble tomorrow if that damn scarf is missing. But at least I know I can console him with chocolate.